After waiting patiently at a red light on my way in this morning, I shoved off on my green just to hear horrific screeching to my left. Yes, a motorist had run the red light and managed to slam on his brakes only inches from my left side. THIS IS THE FOURTH TIME IN TWO DAYS THIS HAS HAPPENED. I had a well meaning but obnoxious cyclist follow me through town admonishing me for ever red light I ran. My dear friend, if I have to stop a green lights to let the motorists go past, and I have to stop at red lights, HOW THE FUCK AM I GOING TO GET TO WORK? FLY?
And we all know that if I was killed by any one of those four shitweasels, the media would have blamed it on me and the cops would have given them the walk. I wouldn’t even have the chance to be a proper martyr for my people. It really is fucking disgustingly unfair.
Also, you know what really grosses me out?
Fat Cops.
If I’m being chased by a knife-wielding psychopath or an ipod-hungry thug, and the people assigned the job of ‘protecting’ me can’t even run as fast as me, I’m dead meat for sure. Not to mention that the sweaty, bulbous, pink skinned heroes charged with ticketing bikers are issued high-powered motorcycles. Because god forbid they have to exert any energy on the way to standing in the sun drinking coffee by the side of the road. Pathetic.
